Movie Review
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2 Fast 2 Furious
2 Fast 2 Furious isn't as good as the first. There is a very flimsy, silly plot, very little acting, cartoon like characters, and, it loses a lot without a big presence like Vin Diesel. That said, newcomer Tyrese does make his presence known and steals the movie. There is also a distinct lack of originality that characterized the first. This ends up being a buddy movie, with lots of pretty cars and pretty girls. The first was fast, this however, ends up being not quite so furious. 3 Stars Out of 5
3:10 to Yuma
3:10 to Yuma is a rare western and also the rare remake that equals or improves upon the original. Exceptionally well acted, it sticks pretty close to the original plot, including much of the dialogue, but adds 30 minutes and changes the ending significantly. Both Russell Crowe and Christian Bale are at the top of their acting game here. It does drag a bit in the middle, but it is for the most part very, very good. 4 Stars Out of 5
12 Rounds - 20th Century Fox - Rated PG-13
12 Rounds features pro wrestler John Cena in a ridiculously cheesy and unbelievable movie packed with so many unintentional laughs I was doubled over with laughter for much of the film. The dialogue features hilariously bad gems like "OK, here's how this rodeo's gonna work" and "one more time for the cheap seats" - delivered with a straight face! Then there's Cena's character. He's a cop…he's a firefighter…he can do anything! Of course! He was a pro wrestler in another life! The movie is basically a never ending series of car chases while Cena races from one stunt to the next. One question I had, though. Do steroids remove facial expressions? Because Cena has none. Just sayin'. 12 rounds? Nah…this ones a suckerpunch. 1 ½ stars Out of 5
13 Going On 30
I liked 13 going on 30. But that is mostly because of Jennifer Garner who shows us she is going to be a big star. Both she and Mark Ruffalo are very likable and provide just the right balance of fun and vulnerability to make this movie memorable, with a script that is mostly retread from other, better movies.
3 ½ Stars Out of 5
21 - Sony - Rated PG-13
21 is about a group of M.I.T. brainiacs that become a Vegas card counting club and win millions. While that might sound exciting, it isn't. It is lackluster, klunky and predictable with ham fisted direction and incoherent, confusing descriptions of how the number intensive feat is accomplished. The audience gets lost and eventually bored by the whole thing so that by the time anything happens we've lost interest and don't care. This one taps out before it gets underway and gives so many bum cards, it's a bust. Gamblers Anonymous is more fun. 2 Stars Out of 5
27 Dresses - 20th Century Fox - Rated PG-13
In 27 Dresses, Katherine Heigl is lovely and really shines. She is quickly establishing herself as a top movie star. The film however, is standard chick flick fare. Take Heigl out of it, and it's nothing all that special.
3 Stars Out of 5
30 Days of Night - Sony - Rated R
30 Days of Night is about hyperactive vampires with wicked teeth on a feeding frenzy in a place where every year there is no sunlight for a month, Barrow Alaska. That's a great premise and this is a mighty good twist on the vampire film. It is blood - eee! with enough gushers and other great special effects to fill the town! While the ending is a bit of a let down, the rest of the film is perfectly executed and is a must see for horror fans. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
300
Big and loud with excesses abounding, 300 is cool to look at, long on sex, blood, six pack abs, beheadings and other assorted violence, but short on story. It is two hours of overblown, almost non-stop battle sequences that start to wear thin about half way through the film. The stylized look of the computer generated blood which flies but then disappears, and the look of the film as a whole somewhat insulates the audience from the film, making it one of those good but bad movies. 3 Stars Out of 5
2012 - Sony - Rated PG-13
2012 is like a bad infomercial. Hey, here's a movie with ALL the disasters in it. Earthquake! Flood! Volcano eruptions…but wait there's more! Tidal waves! A sinking ship! A plane crash…now how much would you pay? There's even a motorhome on fire! A broken marriage! An estranged kid! And a crazzzzy Woody Harrelson. It's a disaster movie potpourri! And it slices, dices and makes julienne fries! Is there anything this movie doesn't try to do? While watching the destruction does have a high eye candy quotient, and the silly story and sillier dialogue are good for a few laughs, there's so much packed into this movie, Billy Mays would be proud. Call before midnight, and get a free Sham-wow, operators are standing by…2 Stars Out of 5
10,000 B.C. - Warner Brothers - Rated PG-13
in 10,000 B.C., models turned cavemen with their dreadlocks, sixpack abs and perfect teeth try to outrun silly giant ostriches, wooly mammoths are used to construct pyramids, a caveman turns into the saber tooth tiger whisperer and there is long, boring, talky, ridiculous dialog spoken in silly English accents. Yes, it's pretentious and mind-numbingly stupid. In reality, around 10,000 B.C., man was just beginning to use stone tools, but here they ride horses, build pyramids, and have locking handcuffs. There are cool mammoth special effects, but the stupid story and wooden acting turn this into a big pile of mammoth poop. 1 ½ Stars Out of 5
Take the Lead
Take The Lead looks like the film makers knew it needed help, so they threw every visual trick they had at it to try to keep us from noticing. It didn't work. Antonio Banderas has appeal, but sometimes even he has problems with this clunky script. This is supposed to be a true story, but comes off on screen totally fake. This film wants to bring "street cred" to Ballroom, but stumbles around, almost getting a step right here and there, but ultimately showing it has two left feet. 2 ½ stars out of 5
Taken - 20th Century Fox - Rated PG-13
Liam Neeson stars in the tension filled action movie Taken. Normally, one doesn't think of Liam Neeson as an action hero. But in this exciting thriller, he's a baad mutha shut-your-mouth! The movie gets a touch unbelievable as Liam, armed only with a pistol, manages to outshoot a dozen or so bad guys wielding submachine guns…but let's not quibble over reality. This movie is fun although it made me want to change any plans to travel abroad…forever. 4 Stars Out of 5
Taking Lives
Taking Lives contains one of Angelina Jolie's better performances. She is much less cartoonish and more genuinely real than she's been in several films. That said, the film itself is uneven. I found myself drawn into the movie's plot and feel, but especially during the last third, I found myself rolling my eyes. And if you pause to consider many, or should I say most of the plot elements, you will realize how preposterous this is. But I did find myself enjoying it.
3 Stars Out of 5
The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 - Sony - Rated R
The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 is a decent remake of the 1974 film, with some decent action. Denzel Washington plays the good guy while John Travolta is the bad guy sporting a goatee and neck tattoo. He is intense and over the top terrific in all his glowering, scenery-chewing glory. Washington is also pretty good in a film that you might remember for a day or two, but that's it. Take the rental car instead…3 Stars Out of 5
Taking Woodstock - Paramount - Rated R
Taking Woodstock is the most conventional film of Ang Lee's career. So conventional, it will be forgotten. Stand up comic Demitri Martin is deadpan and displays almost no acting skill, yet he was cast in the lead. There are several good performances, most notably Eugene Levy as Max Yasgur, and Liev Schreiber stands out as the transsexual head of security. If you want the lowdown on the concert, skip this movie and rent the documentary. The concert is only a speck in the background for most of the film. If you want a fictionalized account of the goings-on in the background of the concert, this might be good for a rental. Taking stock of Taking Woodstock, I expected much more. 3 Stars Out of 5
Talk To Her
Talk To Her is fascinating, sometimes funny, and at times uncomfortable to watch. This is nonetheless an interesting comparison and examination of two men in similar circumstances and their very different reactions to them. This film will be with you long after you've left the theater.
4 ½ Stars Out of 5
Talledega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
Talledega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby is funny. Will Ferrell is terrific, and while it does drag in parts, the first 30 minutes are worth the price of admission by themselves. Too much product placement seems like a joke at first, but then you get the feeling that the producers really were making a lot of money for relentless ads for Old Spice and Wonder Bread, and more products than should be in any movie. Then there really is a commercial - (yes a real commercial!) for Applebee's in the movie! That's not so funny. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Taxi
If you've seen the trailer for Taxi, you've already seen all of the best parts. The rest of the film isn't nearly as good. I liked Jimmy Fallon on Saturday Night Live, but he's downright irritating in his first film. Queen Latifah is capable of so much more, but right now, it looks like she's just collecting paychecks. And I was embarrassed for Ann Margaret playing the drunk mother of Jimmy Fallon. I wanted to laugh, but didn't - not once during the entire movie. This movie is not only unfunny, but insults our intelligence with ridiculous stunts, boring chase scenes, and implausible characters. The bloopers at the end aren't even funny! Do yourself a favor with Taxi…Skip it.
1 ½ Stars Out of 5
Teachers Pet
Teachers Pet has one thing going for it, it has a lot of inside jokes. But the kids won't get them, and the animation stinks. My kids didn't want to see it at all! 2 ½ Stars Out of 5
Team America World Police
I kept asking myself if I should be laughing at Team America World Police. I was. I was laughing hard. But it felt wrong. But this is a extremely funny movie. Yes it's crude. It's filthy and disgusting at times. But, it's always funny. And if you are a fan of Alec Baldwin, Sean Penn, Tim Robbins, Janean Garafalo, or Michael Moore, you may not like what happens to them in this film.
4 Stars Out of 5
Tears of the Sun
Tears of the Sun is tense, at times heart wrenching and moving. Bruce Willis plays his character with complexity and is the best part of this fine movie. Monica Belucci is a bit one dimensional, but gives a good enough performance to not detract from the film. While not quite as good as other recent war movies, Tears of the Sun will stick with you.
4 Stars Out of 5
Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny
Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny is easily one of the year's very worst movies. I loathed every minute of it. It's a dope of a movie in more ways than one. Dope was obviously used in the creation of this mess, and you need to be on it to find this funny. Writing, plot, and acting are all bad on an astronomical scale. This pick of destiny came from Jack Black's shorts after a long night of tooting and scratching. ½ Star Out of 5
Terribly Happy - Oscilloscope Pictures - Not Rated
Terribly Happy is quirky, darkly comic, moody and subversive. While we watch the main character's attempt at starting anew, we know his descent into a small, isolated town's collective madness is a certainty. The fun is watching how it happens. Terribly Happy, is, like its title, ironic. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
The Terminal
The Terminal is warm and funny, but many times unbelievable and a bit contrived. Tom Hanks' performance lifts the movie above mediocrity with some help from a great supporting cast. After seeing The Terminal, I initially enjoyed it, but after thinking about the film, I found myself asking a lot of questions.
3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Terminator Salvation - Warner Bros - Rated PG-13
Terminator Salvation has plenty of action, but not much reason for it. There is almost no story. Fans of the saga know the story but here, we are subjected to action sequence after pointless action sequence and not much more. It's really rather boring, then finally gets going during the last third of the film. There is no real villain here…just a nebulous company so the film suffers and lacks focus. It was very hard to get into and hard to sit through. No Arnie, no salvation…terminate it. 2 Stars Out of 5
Terminator 3: Rise Of The Machines
Terminator 3: Rise Of The Machines is an audience pleaser that moves the saga of John Connor along nicely. It's not as cerebral as say, "The Matrix," but doesn't commit the sin of dullness that "Hulk" does. T-3 has loads of action and a good dose of humor. This keeps you involved in the story, and never drags. I liked it and am looking forward to T-4! 4 Stars Out of 5
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre has more of a story than the original. I realize that's not saying much, but the film does actually generate a lot of tension and some pretty good jumps. It's not for the squeamish. It's slightly more intelligent than the original, and one of the better of the recent glut of horror films, but still we have very little explanation for why the bad guys are the way they are, and how they've done what they do for so long. 3 Stars Out of 5
Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning follows the formula, but it's just not scary. It is pretty brutal, with lots of sadistic gore in place of any genuine scares. Since it's a prequel, we already know from the beginning that the teens are going to die, and nothing will happen to the family. So there is really no suspense at all. I never really wanted to know why Leatherface was the way he was, but this movie tells us. It also gives a very lame explanation for the family's cannibalism. It goes something like this. "meat is meat and bone is bone." Aren't you glad that Jimmy Dean sausage doesn't feel the same way? 2 ½ Stars Out of 5
Thank You For Smoking
If you love satire and black comedy that is not politically correct, Thank You For Smoking is for you! It is a funny, dark, ride that features some terrific writing, loads of humor, and a great, funny performance from Aaron Eckhart. But my favorite in the film, is Rob Lowe as a Hollywood big shot who wishes he were Asian. 4 Stars Out of 5
That Evening Sun - Rated PG-13
That Evening Sun features Hal Holbrook in his first solo starring role. After all these years, that's a shame. He is spectacular. The film is beautifully shot, but it leaves too many unanswered questions. While Holbrook is nothing but sun, he eclipses the film. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
The Way We Get By - International Film Circuit - Not Rated
The Way We Get By is about a group of mostly senior citizens in Bangor, Maine who travel to the airport and welcome home returning soldiers. This documentary is extraordinarily moving; my heart was in my throat for most of it. I appreciate the troops - the heroes that defend our country, and these fine citizens - heroes that greet them as they return. 4 Stars Out of 5
Then She Found Me - Thinkfilm - Rated R
Then She Found Me, is basically a chick-flick about a woman whose biological clock is clicking so loudly, that's all she can hear. Director-producer-screenwriter-star Helen Hunt looks tired, - haggard even - and no wonder! I'm surprised she didn't do the catering for the film as well. She plays a whiny, deeply flawed character that you have trouble feeling any sympathy for. Matthew Broderick is very low key, almost invisible, and Bette Midler is good but irritating. Colin Firth, however, steals the movie - he's the best he's ever been and is really the only reason to see it. Who knew that the king of the chick flicks had it in him? A, (dare I say it?) interesting performance. But the film, like the bristly screen persona of its star, keeps you at arms length and just when you start to feel any affection for it, it smacks you in the face and expects you to like it.
3 Stars Out of 5
There Will Be Blood - Miramax/Paramount - Rated R
Daniel Day Lewis' performance is the reason to see There Will Be Blood. He so completely transforms himself into his character, you no longer see the actor behind it. He commands the screen every minute. The movie, while overlong, doesn't bore - and that is entirely due to Lewis' exceptional performance. 4 Stars Out of 5
Things We Lost In the Fire - Dreamworks - Rated R
Things We Lost In the Fire contains amazing performances that might very well garner Oscar Nominations for Halle Berry and Benicio Del Torro. The film is a tearful examination of grief and addiction. Powerful and emotional, it is great! 4 ½ Stars Out of 5
Thirteen
Thirteen is incredibly powerful and bleak, but very well done. This one tied my heart up in knots. It is very hard to watch. That said, if you have kids that are in or about to enter their teen years, this is a must see. 4 Stars Out of 5
The Thunderbirds
The Thunderbirds has a great look and is actually pretty entertaining. You can't help but draw comparisons to Spy Kids, but this movie actually stands well on it's own. The sets harken back to the old TV show even if the rest doesn't. It's not great, but it's fun.
3 Stars Out of 5
This Christmas - Sony - Rated PG-13This Chistmas looks like it was stolen right out of Tyler Perry's notebook. The matriarch is even called Madea. But with faux hilarity and fake good times aplenty, nothing feels genuine. This is the kind of movie I hate. Drama, conflict, lying, cheating, LOADS of yelling and other unsavory things that are supposed to be funny, but will do nothing for your Christmas spirit except drain it. Go see any other movie instead! 1 ½ Stars Out of 5
Michael Jackson's This is It - Sony - Rated PG
Michael Jackson's This is It consists of numbers cobbled together from multiple performances during hours of rehearsals. High School Musical's Kenny Ortega directed the movie as well as the stage show, but make no mistake, this was all Michael Jackson. Despite early news reports to the contrary, he still had it. He is the one in charge. The frustrating and fascinating part of watching this film is; that it is a rehearsal - these are not complete performances. The special effects and props that would have been used were not finished and Jackson himself holds back on much, choosing to sing only parts of his songs. Had Jackson lived to perform these shows, they would have been a triumph. This film shows what could have been. 4 Stars Out of 5
Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada
Tommy Lee Jones directed and stars in Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada, a movie that some may object to as it shows illegal aliens from Mexico in a very positive light. Jones does a magnificent job at both direction and acting. Barry Pepper is also very good as the villain and victim of Tommy Lee's rage. This film is unpredictable and a lot of fun. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Til Human Voices Wake Us
Guy Pierce and Helena Bonham Carter star in a somewhat misguided ghost story that has no hint of fright or fear. This has a coming of age story that seems charming and heartwarming interwoven with another story that has a wisp of mystery and foreboding, but then you find out there really is no mystery at all, just a bit of a misfire.
2 1/2 Stars Out of 5
Time Changer
A Christian themed movie from the Trinity Broadcast Network. A Bible professor travels forward in time 100 years to see the results of his writings. While I am in favor of trying to put moral values into the movies, this film has a shrill, sledgehammer approach to sin and salvation. Clunky dialogue, a silly plot, and really bad acting make this painful to watch. 1 Star Out of 5
Timeline
There is some good action in Timeline. I liked the premise of a group of archaeologists traveling back to the 14th Century. But the film itself is clunky. It contains some horrifically bad dialogue, and with all the gratuitous explosions, it adds up to the quality one might expect to see on a direct to video movie.
2 ½ Stars Out of 5
TMNT
There's always been a charm about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Unfortuately, they've lost a lot of it. The CGI version has an Incomprehensible script and a redesign of the turtles that is bizarre. The fun of the old turtles is gone…this one is only here to sell toys and videogames. TMNT is not cowabunga dude! 2 Stars Out of 5
The Tooth Fairy - 20th Century Fox - Rated PG)
The Rock is a fairy. He even wears a dress…a tutu no less. If that floats your boat, you might like The Tooth Fairy. He is embarrassed and embarrassing most of the time, while Ashley Judd is wasted, and only Julie Andrews manages to keep her dignity. But this movie is a toothache most of the time. It gums its way through an unfunny, numb script so full of cavities, 20 years of braces couldn't help, and feels like we're getting a root canal most of the time. This fairy is toothless. They told us the tooth hurts…yes it did. A lot. Toothfully, it's a stinker. 1 ½ Stars Out of 5
Torque
Torque is just a long music video that has dialogue that is so bad and action that is so unbelievable that it makes you laugh…but when you realize you paid 8 bucks to see it, it may make you cry…1 ½ Stars Out of 5
Touching Home - Sony - Rated PG-13
Twin brothers Logan & Noah Miller wrote, produced, directed and star in Touching Home. And that's its main problem. They are devoid of any acting talent whatsoever, and they try to carry the movie. But anytime a real actor enters the scene, the twins wither and almost disappear. It's a better movie when they aren't in it. But unfortunately, they are in it 95% of the time. Ed Harris is great as usual, as is Robert Forster, but this is a strange, depressing movie that probably shouldn't have been made. There's nothing touching about it. 2 Stars Out of 5
Toy Story 3 - Disney - Rated G
When was the last time you saw a movie with a "3" in the title that was actually good? Well, Pixar accomplishes the nearly impossible with Toy Story 3. It is every bit as good as the first 2, and maybe even better! I don't know how Pixar keeps doing it! It has amazing detail, plenty of action, a heartwarming story and loads of humor. While most of the favorites from the first two movies are back, Ken, as in Barbie and Ken, voiced by Michael Keaton, steals the movie and is spectacular. His wardrobe alone is worth several times the price of admission. But you will want to bring the tissues, towards the end, there isn't a dry eye in the theater…the three-peat is a 3-D masterpiece. 5 Stars Out of 5
Traitor - Overture Films - Rated PG-13Traitor is executive produced and co-written by Steve Martin, but this is no family comedy. This is a somber and fascinating look into international terrorism. Don Cheadle is as always, amazing, and delivers a multilayered, mesmerizing performance that unexpectedly draws you into a story of terrorism and intrigue. The movie does its best to be provocative and it works. It is complex and convoluted with a number of twists and turns, and we never quite know what is going on until the end. 3 Stars Out of 5
Transamerica
Felicity Huffman is an amazing actress. She makes Transamerica, a film with an assuredly fringe subject extraordinarily watchable, and turns in one of the finest performances of the year. Although I really didn't expect to like it, the film itself is funny, touching, and actually very good. 4 Stars Out of 5
Transformers
Sure Transformers is hokey…but it sure is a blast! Its simple good vs. evil plot combined with action to the extreme and outstanding special effects all make for a great popcorn movie. Star Shia LeBeouf is terrific, and like all of director Michael Bay's films, this has plenty of explosions, is bombastic and too long, but it's probably the most fun you'll have at the movies this summer. 4 Stars Out of 5
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Paramount - Rated PG-13
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen assumes you've seen the first, but then again, if you haven't, don't worry. It doesn't really matter. Even though it is very long, there's not much story here - and what there is, is incomprehensible. There are human stars of the movie, but they don't matter either. Aside from the many crude jokes about male genitalia, there is so much action, the action becomes boring. Director Michael Bay's philosophy of film making is "When you don't know what else to do, blow something up." There is so much bombast it's hard to tell what is going on. There are more explosions than I've ever seen in a movie…Transformers: Stuff Blows Up would be a better name. Or maybe Explosions: The movie. Oh, wait, that's Michael Bay's next film. 2 Stars Out of 5
The Transporter
This is one of the best action films to come out in near memory, and the key word here is action...not acting...If you like lots of great car chases, explosions, and a film that's loads of fun, this one is for you...3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Transporter 2
While the original Transporter was a pretty good action picture with a fresh take on the genre, gimmicks abound in the totally unbelievable Transporter 2. Jason Statham returns as the man who drives and delivers for a living. Even if you check your brain at the door, you will still have a hard time swallowing some of the stunts that abound in this film. It does have a lot of action, with some great chase sequences, but fans of the first film will be disappointed. I was. 3 Stars out of 5
Transporter 3 - Lionsgate - Rated PG-13
Take a cute red haired freckle faced Russian actress in her first film, put her alongside fast car chases, explosions aplenty and Jason Stathan's six pack abs. What do you get? Transporter 3. While it is silly and unbelievable at times, it's an improvement over number two and is good for some mindless fun. 3 Stars Out of 5
Transylmania - Full Circle - Rated R
Hideous in more ways than I could count, Transylmania is a dopey take on vampire films that looks like a high school film project more than a feature film. It makes 90 minutes seem like an eternity. This stupid mishmash is dead on arrival. It's a toothless comedy with no pulse. It made me feel like I was dead. Pound a stake though it's heart, cut off it's head and bury it forever. 1 Star Out of 5
Trapped
This is a hard movie to watch for two reasons. First, its subject matter. It deals with a small girl (played by Dakota Fanning from "I Am Sam") getting stolen from her home and held for ransom. Then, much of it is shot with a hand held camera and the camera movements are so jerky it is difficult to stay focused. This is not a very believable movie and the last quarter is pretty stupid. Charlize Theron is the highlight here, and if Kevin Bacon keeps playing bad guys he'll have to depend on those Visa check card commercials.2 ½ Stars Out of 5
Treasure Planet
Treasure Planet has great visuals...The concept of 18th century sailing ships in the future traveling in space is very interesting...and I did like it, but the movie just seems to be missing a little something. 3 Stars Out of 5
The Tripper
The Tripper and its director David Arquette, do their best to sully the memory of Ronald Reagan by dressing the serial killer in this movie up as the 40th president. It's a grainy, low budget film that is more about drugs than about horror. Just Say No to The Tripper.
1 Star Out of 5
Trisdan & Isolde
James Franco and Sophia Myles form two thirds of a love triangle in Trisdan & Isolde. This takes place in ancient Ireland and England after the fall of the Roman Empire. Franco's acting is sometimes a bit too wooden, but the film's action sequences are pretty good, and the story kept me involved. It's a chick flick that has enough action to satisfy the guys. 3 Stars out of 5
Troy
Inflated to almost 3 hours, Troy could well have been cut to a reasonable length and been decent. What we have, though, is a way overlong frequently tedious, film that thinks it is better than it is. For fans of Homer, there are numerous liberties taken with the story, in fact, too many to mention. The acting covers the gamut from laughably bad (from Brian Cox's over the top performance) to very good from Peter O'Toole. And, the film bestows all of it's beauty scenes not on Helen of Troy, but on Brad of Hollywood…
2 ½ Stars Out of 5
The Truth About Charlie
The Truth About Charlie is this movie tries hard, but isn't mysterious, isn't as action-packed as it promises to be, and isn't much fun. As a matter of fact, the truth about The Truth is, skip it. 2 Stars Out of 5
Tuck Everlasting
This may be a bit of a disappointment for fans of the book, (my son included here) as it takes some artistic license, but this is a great looking, magical, family film that has some touching moments and terrific performances from Ben Kingsley and Alexis Bledel. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Tupac: Ressurection
Tupac: Ressurection is a pretty good documentary that leaves a few unanswered questions. I came away from the movie impressed with Tupac as an artist and persona, but disappointed at the way he wasted his talent and his life. The movie leaves us with the impression that he knew of his impending demise and planned for it. It stops just short of turning him into a martyr and saint.
3 Stars Out of 5
Turistas
Turistas starts off promising with the tale of tourists in Brazil. The first hour has got lots of jiggle and skin, and then the story starts to kick in, teasing us with a tale of black market human organs, but drops the ball and turns into a claustrophobic underwater chase. This had potential, but squanders it. 2 Stars Out of 5
The Tuxedo
The script is a bit ridiculous, but if you check your brain at the door, this movie is fun. Jackie Chan and Jennifer Love Hewitt don't have a whole lot of chemistry here, but Jackie Chan is his usual engaging self, with a bit more special effects than we are used to with a Jackie Chan movie. And once again, the out-takes are the funniest part of the movie.
3 Stars Out of 5
The TV Set
The TV Set is a funny, searing, biting, sarcastic indictment on Television and those that program it. It is very enjoyable with barbed humor that is as relevant today as network was in it's day. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
25th Hour
In the 25th Hour, watch for exceptionally strong performances by Edward Norton and Anna Paquin, slick direction by Spike Lee and great acting all around in this gritty and somewhat depressing story set in post 9-11 New York City. This is not the usual Spike Lee fare.
4 Stars Out of 5
28 Days Later
In 28 Days Later a group of animal rights activists break into a London primate research lab and unwittingly release a virus that turns people into cannibalistic zombies. Flash forward 28 days and a young man awakes from a coma in a hospital to find England deserted with the only signs of life wanting to eat him. Yes, I know this is a cheery subject, but boy is this a good movie! Filmed on video so it has a kind of raw feel from the start. And it will keep you on the edge of your seat. It is terrifying, very well done, and it stays with you for quite awhile after.
4 ½ Stars Out of 5
28 Weeks Later
28 Weeks Later is chock full of great action, scares and good performances but also has an intelligent plot. This is a fine sequel that comes close to the original and adds to it nicely. The ending was left open so I'm wondering if the next will be 28 months later, then the next, 28 Years Later and so on. 4 Stars Out of 5
Twilight - Summit Entertainment - Rated PG-13
Twilight is a chick flick romance wrapped up in a vampire movie.
It's a little campy at times, and throws most vampire conventions out with yesterday's rotten garlic. These vampires have no fangs, don't sleep in coffins or cower at the sight of a cross, and they prefer the rainy Pacific Northwest because when they go in the sunlight it makes their skin glow as if it were embedded with thousands of tiny diamonds. The cast is very good, I was impressed with the two leads, as well as with the supporting cast. The film throws a little conflict in at the last minute almost as an afterthought - it seems rushed and underdone. Twilight has very little sex or violence. No, this is all about the romance. This Vampire has no teeth, but likes to nibble. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Twilight Saga: Eclipse - Summit Entertainment - Rated PG-13
Here's what you want to know about The Twilight Saga: Eclipse. Taylor Lautner's shirt is off for most of the movie. I started counting the scenes where he was bare chested, but then it became obvious that I should instead count the scenes where he is actually wearing a shirt. (One and a half.) Does anything else really matter to Twilight fans? The odd love triangle is in full force, there isn't as much brooding here, which is a plus. The CGI wolves are still hokey - with all the money these films make, couldn't they have spent a little more to make realistic looking wolves? On the plus side, there is more action, more blood and even decapitations.
This is the best of the three films so far…although that's not really saying all that much. The abs have it. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
The Twilight Saga: New Moon - Summit Entertainment - Rated PG-13
In order to make sense out of New Moon, you have to have seen Twilight. Even then, it's not really about the story. It's about the pasty faced vampire Edward with the too-tussled hair, versus the hunky healthy looking werewolf Jacob. It was easy to see who the audience liked as giddy shrieks of delight from the mostly female audience accompanied the removal of Jacob's shirt. I couldn't get past the bad CGI wolves, worse dialogue and wooden acting. This is pure mediocre romantic novel melodrama. There is no blood, but apparently these vampires need calcium because this movie is all cheese. 2 Stars Out of 5
Twisted
While I was watching Twisted it felt like I'd seen this same movie before. Here's Ashley Judd in another movie just like she's made a couple of times before. Ashley is nice to look at, and that's the only reason you'd want to watch this movie. This one isn't very difficult to figure out either…this movie is such a clinker you can hear it clinking from outside the theater.
2 Stars Out of 5
Two Brothers
Two Brothers is too scary for the little kids and too boring for most of the others…If you really love tigers, you should see this movie. It is beautifully shot. But it's too long for a kids movie. The children in the theater were quite restless…paying much more attention to the arms on the seats than to the film. But, I liked it.
3 Stars Out of 5
Two For The Money
I enjoyed both the characters and the performances in Two For The Money especially Al Pacino who almost reprises his role in The Devil's Advocate. Matthew McConaughey and Rene Russo also turn in very good performances. It is extremely entertaining to watch, but it is a close variation on the movie Wall Street. So close, they might have named it Wall Street Lite. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Tyler Perry's Daddy's Little Girls
No Madea this time, but in Tyler Perry's Daddy's Little Girls, Perry delivers a much more polished effort. A little heavier on the religious message than the previous two Tyler Perry films, but overall this morality tale is inspirational and enjoyable.
3 Stars Out of 5
Tyler Perry's I Can Do Bad All By Myself - Lionsgate - Rated PG-13
Tyler Perry's I Can Do Bad All By Myself follows the exact same formula as all of his other movies, but this time has the wonderful Taraji P. Henson in the lead role. That makes all the difference. The film once again combines slapstick with melodrama and a religious message and could do with some trimming, but this is Perry's most appealing movie yet. All of the credit for that goes to Henson. But the laughs go to Perry's Madea. Madea's version of the Bible is the funniest thing in a Tyler Perry movie yet. Nothing bad here. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Tyler Perry's The Family That Preys - Lionsgate - Rated PG-13
Tyler Perry is becoming a better director, and The Family That Preys is more even than his earlier efforts, but his storytelling skills are stuck in neutral. This film seems more heavy handed than previous entries and has precious little humor. Still, it has a few bright spots. Kathy Bates is great and is the highlight of the film. Mostly sappy and melodramatic, it ends up being another Thelma and Louise knockoff. 2 ½ Stars Out of 5
Tyson - Sony - Rated R
The biggest problem with the movie Tyson is Mike Tyson himself. He is front and center for most of the film's running time, and, while he commands the boxing ring, he cannot command an audience. His speaking style, combined with unusual editing that overlaps what he says, make this film unintelligible at times, and sometimes downright irritating. He rambles on and on in stunted malaprop littered English with little else but the change of a camera angle to add any variety. Occasionally the film comes up for air, inserting a clip of a fight or past news story, giving us some relief. But the film is not without its merits. What Tyson says about Don King is worth the price of admission all by itself. It's ultimately a film about a boxing legend who reveals himself as someone who was damaged by more than punches. It's not a knockout, but a win by split decision…3 Stars Out of 5
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2 Fast 2 Furious
2 Fast 2 Furious isn't as good as the first. There is a very flimsy, silly plot, very little acting, cartoon like characters, and, it loses a lot without a big presence like Vin Diesel. That said, newcomer Tyrese does make his presence known and steals the movie. There is also a distinct lack of originality that characterized the first. This ends up being a buddy movie, with lots of pretty cars and pretty girls. The first was fast, this however, ends up being not quite so furious. 3 Stars Out of 5
3:10 to Yuma
3:10 to Yuma is a rare western and also the rare remake that equals or improves upon the original. Exceptionally well acted, it sticks pretty close to the original plot, including much of the dialogue, but adds 30 minutes and changes the ending significantly. Both Russell Crowe and Christian Bale are at the top of their acting game here. It does drag a bit in the middle, but it is for the most part very, very good. 4 Stars Out of 5
12 Rounds - 20th Century Fox - Rated PG-13
12 Rounds features pro wrestler John Cena in a ridiculously cheesy and unbelievable movie packed with so many unintentional laughs I was doubled over with laughter for much of the film. The dialogue features hilariously bad gems like "OK, here's how this rodeo's gonna work" and "one more time for the cheap seats" - delivered with a straight face! Then there's Cena's character. He's a cop…he's a firefighter…he can do anything! Of course! He was a pro wrestler in another life! The movie is basically a never ending series of car chases while Cena races from one stunt to the next. One question I had, though. Do steroids remove facial expressions? Because Cena has none. Just sayin'. 12 rounds? Nah…this ones a suckerpunch. 1 ½ stars Out of 5
13 Going On 30
I liked 13 going on 30. But that is mostly because of Jennifer Garner who shows us she is going to be a big star. Both she and Mark Ruffalo are very likable and provide just the right balance of fun and vulnerability to make this movie memorable, with a script that is mostly retread from other, better movies.
3 ½ Stars Out of 5
21 - Sony - Rated PG-13
21 is about a group of M.I.T. brainiacs that become a Vegas card counting club and win millions. While that might sound exciting, it isn't. It is lackluster, klunky and predictable with ham fisted direction and incoherent, confusing descriptions of how the number intensive feat is accomplished. The audience gets lost and eventually bored by the whole thing so that by the time anything happens we've lost interest and don't care. This one taps out before it gets underway and gives so many bum cards, it's a bust. Gamblers Anonymous is more fun. 2 Stars Out of 5
27 Dresses - 20th Century Fox - Rated PG-13
In 27 Dresses, Katherine Heigl is lovely and really shines. She is quickly establishing herself as a top movie star. The film however, is standard chick flick fare. Take Heigl out of it, and it's nothing all that special.
3 Stars Out of 5
30 Days of Night - Sony - Rated R
30 Days of Night is about hyperactive vampires with wicked teeth on a feeding frenzy in a place where every year there is no sunlight for a month, Barrow Alaska. That's a great premise and this is a mighty good twist on the vampire film. It is blood - eee! with enough gushers and other great special effects to fill the town! While the ending is a bit of a let down, the rest of the film is perfectly executed and is a must see for horror fans. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
300
Big and loud with excesses abounding, 300 is cool to look at, long on sex, blood, six pack abs, beheadings and other assorted violence, but short on story. It is two hours of overblown, almost non-stop battle sequences that start to wear thin about half way through the film. The stylized look of the computer generated blood which flies but then disappears, and the look of the film as a whole somewhat insulates the audience from the film, making it one of those good but bad movies. 3 Stars Out of 5
2012 - Sony - Rated PG-13
2012 is like a bad infomercial. Hey, here's a movie with ALL the disasters in it. Earthquake! Flood! Volcano eruptions…but wait there's more! Tidal waves! A sinking ship! A plane crash…now how much would you pay? There's even a motorhome on fire! A broken marriage! An estranged kid! And a crazzzzy Woody Harrelson. It's a disaster movie potpourri! And it slices, dices and makes julienne fries! Is there anything this movie doesn't try to do? While watching the destruction does have a high eye candy quotient, and the silly story and sillier dialogue are good for a few laughs, there's so much packed into this movie, Billy Mays would be proud. Call before midnight, and get a free Sham-wow, operators are standing by…2 Stars Out of 5
10,000 B.C. - Warner Brothers - Rated PG-13
in 10,000 B.C., models turned cavemen with their dreadlocks, sixpack abs and perfect teeth try to outrun silly giant ostriches, wooly mammoths are used to construct pyramids, a caveman turns into the saber tooth tiger whisperer and there is long, boring, talky, ridiculous dialog spoken in silly English accents. Yes, it's pretentious and mind-numbingly stupid. In reality, around 10,000 B.C., man was just beginning to use stone tools, but here they ride horses, build pyramids, and have locking handcuffs. There are cool mammoth special effects, but the stupid story and wooden acting turn this into a big pile of mammoth poop. 1 ½ Stars Out of 5
Take the Lead
Take The Lead looks like the film makers knew it needed help, so they threw every visual trick they had at it to try to keep us from noticing. It didn't work. Antonio Banderas has appeal, but sometimes even he has problems with this clunky script. This is supposed to be a true story, but comes off on screen totally fake. This film wants to bring "street cred" to Ballroom, but stumbles around, almost getting a step right here and there, but ultimately showing it has two left feet. 2 ½ stars out of 5
Taken - 20th Century Fox - Rated PG-13
Liam Neeson stars in the tension filled action movie Taken. Normally, one doesn't think of Liam Neeson as an action hero. But in this exciting thriller, he's a baad mutha shut-your-mouth! The movie gets a touch unbelievable as Liam, armed only with a pistol, manages to outshoot a dozen or so bad guys wielding submachine guns…but let's not quibble over reality. This movie is fun although it made me want to change any plans to travel abroad…forever. 4 Stars Out of 5
Taking Lives
Taking Lives contains one of Angelina Jolie's better performances. She is much less cartoonish and more genuinely real than she's been in several films. That said, the film itself is uneven. I found myself drawn into the movie's plot and feel, but especially during the last third, I found myself rolling my eyes. And if you pause to consider many, or should I say most of the plot elements, you will realize how preposterous this is. But I did find myself enjoying it.
3 Stars Out of 5
The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 - Sony - Rated R
The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 is a decent remake of the 1974 film, with some decent action. Denzel Washington plays the good guy while John Travolta is the bad guy sporting a goatee and neck tattoo. He is intense and over the top terrific in all his glowering, scenery-chewing glory. Washington is also pretty good in a film that you might remember for a day or two, but that's it. Take the rental car instead…3 Stars Out of 5
Taking Woodstock - Paramount - Rated R
Taking Woodstock is the most conventional film of Ang Lee's career. So conventional, it will be forgotten. Stand up comic Demitri Martin is deadpan and displays almost no acting skill, yet he was cast in the lead. There are several good performances, most notably Eugene Levy as Max Yasgur, and Liev Schreiber stands out as the transsexual head of security. If you want the lowdown on the concert, skip this movie and rent the documentary. The concert is only a speck in the background for most of the film. If you want a fictionalized account of the goings-on in the background of the concert, this might be good for a rental. Taking stock of Taking Woodstock, I expected much more. 3 Stars Out of 5
Talk To Her
Talk To Her is fascinating, sometimes funny, and at times uncomfortable to watch. This is nonetheless an interesting comparison and examination of two men in similar circumstances and their very different reactions to them. This film will be with you long after you've left the theater.
4 ½ Stars Out of 5
Talledega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
Talledega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby is funny. Will Ferrell is terrific, and while it does drag in parts, the first 30 minutes are worth the price of admission by themselves. Too much product placement seems like a joke at first, but then you get the feeling that the producers really were making a lot of money for relentless ads for Old Spice and Wonder Bread, and more products than should be in any movie. Then there really is a commercial - (yes a real commercial!) for Applebee's in the movie! That's not so funny. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Taxi
If you've seen the trailer for Taxi, you've already seen all of the best parts. The rest of the film isn't nearly as good. I liked Jimmy Fallon on Saturday Night Live, but he's downright irritating in his first film. Queen Latifah is capable of so much more, but right now, it looks like she's just collecting paychecks. And I was embarrassed for Ann Margaret playing the drunk mother of Jimmy Fallon. I wanted to laugh, but didn't - not once during the entire movie. This movie is not only unfunny, but insults our intelligence with ridiculous stunts, boring chase scenes, and implausible characters. The bloopers at the end aren't even funny! Do yourself a favor with Taxi…Skip it.
1 ½ Stars Out of 5
Teachers Pet
Teachers Pet has one thing going for it, it has a lot of inside jokes. But the kids won't get them, and the animation stinks. My kids didn't want to see it at all! 2 ½ Stars Out of 5
Team America World Police
I kept asking myself if I should be laughing at Team America World Police. I was. I was laughing hard. But it felt wrong. But this is a extremely funny movie. Yes it's crude. It's filthy and disgusting at times. But, it's always funny. And if you are a fan of Alec Baldwin, Sean Penn, Tim Robbins, Janean Garafalo, or Michael Moore, you may not like what happens to them in this film.
4 Stars Out of 5
Tears of the Sun
Tears of the Sun is tense, at times heart wrenching and moving. Bruce Willis plays his character with complexity and is the best part of this fine movie. Monica Belucci is a bit one dimensional, but gives a good enough performance to not detract from the film. While not quite as good as other recent war movies, Tears of the Sun will stick with you.
4 Stars Out of 5
Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny
Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny is easily one of the year's very worst movies. I loathed every minute of it. It's a dope of a movie in more ways than one. Dope was obviously used in the creation of this mess, and you need to be on it to find this funny. Writing, plot, and acting are all bad on an astronomical scale. This pick of destiny came from Jack Black's shorts after a long night of tooting and scratching. ½ Star Out of 5
Terribly Happy - Oscilloscope Pictures - Not Rated
Terribly Happy is quirky, darkly comic, moody and subversive. While we watch the main character's attempt at starting anew, we know his descent into a small, isolated town's collective madness is a certainty. The fun is watching how it happens. Terribly Happy, is, like its title, ironic. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
The Terminal
The Terminal is warm and funny, but many times unbelievable and a bit contrived. Tom Hanks' performance lifts the movie above mediocrity with some help from a great supporting cast. After seeing The Terminal, I initially enjoyed it, but after thinking about the film, I found myself asking a lot of questions.
3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Terminator Salvation - Warner Bros - Rated PG-13
Terminator Salvation has plenty of action, but not much reason for it. There is almost no story. Fans of the saga know the story but here, we are subjected to action sequence after pointless action sequence and not much more. It's really rather boring, then finally gets going during the last third of the film. There is no real villain here…just a nebulous company so the film suffers and lacks focus. It was very hard to get into and hard to sit through. No Arnie, no salvation…terminate it. 2 Stars Out of 5
Terminator 3: Rise Of The Machines
Terminator 3: Rise Of The Machines is an audience pleaser that moves the saga of John Connor along nicely. It's not as cerebral as say, "The Matrix," but doesn't commit the sin of dullness that "Hulk" does. T-3 has loads of action and a good dose of humor. This keeps you involved in the story, and never drags. I liked it and am looking forward to T-4! 4 Stars Out of 5
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre has more of a story than the original. I realize that's not saying much, but the film does actually generate a lot of tension and some pretty good jumps. It's not for the squeamish. It's slightly more intelligent than the original, and one of the better of the recent glut of horror films, but still we have very little explanation for why the bad guys are the way they are, and how they've done what they do for so long. 3 Stars Out of 5
Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning follows the formula, but it's just not scary. It is pretty brutal, with lots of sadistic gore in place of any genuine scares. Since it's a prequel, we already know from the beginning that the teens are going to die, and nothing will happen to the family. So there is really no suspense at all. I never really wanted to know why Leatherface was the way he was, but this movie tells us. It also gives a very lame explanation for the family's cannibalism. It goes something like this. "meat is meat and bone is bone." Aren't you glad that Jimmy Dean sausage doesn't feel the same way? 2 ½ Stars Out of 5
Thank You For Smoking
If you love satire and black comedy that is not politically correct, Thank You For Smoking is for you! It is a funny, dark, ride that features some terrific writing, loads of humor, and a great, funny performance from Aaron Eckhart. But my favorite in the film, is Rob Lowe as a Hollywood big shot who wishes he were Asian. 4 Stars Out of 5
That Evening Sun - Rated PG-13
That Evening Sun features Hal Holbrook in his first solo starring role. After all these years, that's a shame. He is spectacular. The film is beautifully shot, but it leaves too many unanswered questions. While Holbrook is nothing but sun, he eclipses the film. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
The Way We Get By - International Film Circuit - Not Rated
The Way We Get By is about a group of mostly senior citizens in Bangor, Maine who travel to the airport and welcome home returning soldiers. This documentary is extraordinarily moving; my heart was in my throat for most of it. I appreciate the troops - the heroes that defend our country, and these fine citizens - heroes that greet them as they return. 4 Stars Out of 5
Then She Found Me - Thinkfilm - Rated R
Then She Found Me, is basically a chick-flick about a woman whose biological clock is clicking so loudly, that's all she can hear. Director-producer-screenwriter-star Helen Hunt looks tired, - haggard even - and no wonder! I'm surprised she didn't do the catering for the film as well. She plays a whiny, deeply flawed character that you have trouble feeling any sympathy for. Matthew Broderick is very low key, almost invisible, and Bette Midler is good but irritating. Colin Firth, however, steals the movie - he's the best he's ever been and is really the only reason to see it. Who knew that the king of the chick flicks had it in him? A, (dare I say it?) interesting performance. But the film, like the bristly screen persona of its star, keeps you at arms length and just when you start to feel any affection for it, it smacks you in the face and expects you to like it.
3 Stars Out of 5
There Will Be Blood - Miramax/Paramount - Rated R
Daniel Day Lewis' performance is the reason to see There Will Be Blood. He so completely transforms himself into his character, you no longer see the actor behind it. He commands the screen every minute. The movie, while overlong, doesn't bore - and that is entirely due to Lewis' exceptional performance. 4 Stars Out of 5
Things We Lost In the Fire - Dreamworks - Rated R
Things We Lost In the Fire contains amazing performances that might very well garner Oscar Nominations for Halle Berry and Benicio Del Torro. The film is a tearful examination of grief and addiction. Powerful and emotional, it is great! 4 ½ Stars Out of 5
Thirteen
Thirteen is incredibly powerful and bleak, but very well done. This one tied my heart up in knots. It is very hard to watch. That said, if you have kids that are in or about to enter their teen years, this is a must see. 4 Stars Out of 5
The Thunderbirds
The Thunderbirds has a great look and is actually pretty entertaining. You can't help but draw comparisons to Spy Kids, but this movie actually stands well on it's own. The sets harken back to the old TV show even if the rest doesn't. It's not great, but it's fun.
3 Stars Out of 5
This Christmas - Sony - Rated PG-13This Chistmas looks like it was stolen right out of Tyler Perry's notebook. The matriarch is even called Madea. But with faux hilarity and fake good times aplenty, nothing feels genuine. This is the kind of movie I hate. Drama, conflict, lying, cheating, LOADS of yelling and other unsavory things that are supposed to be funny, but will do nothing for your Christmas spirit except drain it. Go see any other movie instead! 1 ½ Stars Out of 5
Michael Jackson's This is It - Sony - Rated PG
Michael Jackson's This is It consists of numbers cobbled together from multiple performances during hours of rehearsals. High School Musical's Kenny Ortega directed the movie as well as the stage show, but make no mistake, this was all Michael Jackson. Despite early news reports to the contrary, he still had it. He is the one in charge. The frustrating and fascinating part of watching this film is; that it is a rehearsal - these are not complete performances. The special effects and props that would have been used were not finished and Jackson himself holds back on much, choosing to sing only parts of his songs. Had Jackson lived to perform these shows, they would have been a triumph. This film shows what could have been. 4 Stars Out of 5
Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada
Tommy Lee Jones directed and stars in Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada, a movie that some may object to as it shows illegal aliens from Mexico in a very positive light. Jones does a magnificent job at both direction and acting. Barry Pepper is also very good as the villain and victim of Tommy Lee's rage. This film is unpredictable and a lot of fun. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Til Human Voices Wake Us
Guy Pierce and Helena Bonham Carter star in a somewhat misguided ghost story that has no hint of fright or fear. This has a coming of age story that seems charming and heartwarming interwoven with another story that has a wisp of mystery and foreboding, but then you find out there really is no mystery at all, just a bit of a misfire.
2 1/2 Stars Out of 5
Time Changer
A Christian themed movie from the Trinity Broadcast Network. A Bible professor travels forward in time 100 years to see the results of his writings. While I am in favor of trying to put moral values into the movies, this film has a shrill, sledgehammer approach to sin and salvation. Clunky dialogue, a silly plot, and really bad acting make this painful to watch. 1 Star Out of 5
Timeline
There is some good action in Timeline. I liked the premise of a group of archaeologists traveling back to the 14th Century. But the film itself is clunky. It contains some horrifically bad dialogue, and with all the gratuitous explosions, it adds up to the quality one might expect to see on a direct to video movie.
2 ½ Stars Out of 5
TMNT
There's always been a charm about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Unfortuately, they've lost a lot of it. The CGI version has an Incomprehensible script and a redesign of the turtles that is bizarre. The fun of the old turtles is gone…this one is only here to sell toys and videogames. TMNT is not cowabunga dude! 2 Stars Out of 5
The Tooth Fairy - 20th Century Fox - Rated PG)
The Rock is a fairy. He even wears a dress…a tutu no less. If that floats your boat, you might like The Tooth Fairy. He is embarrassed and embarrassing most of the time, while Ashley Judd is wasted, and only Julie Andrews manages to keep her dignity. But this movie is a toothache most of the time. It gums its way through an unfunny, numb script so full of cavities, 20 years of braces couldn't help, and feels like we're getting a root canal most of the time. This fairy is toothless. They told us the tooth hurts…yes it did. A lot. Toothfully, it's a stinker. 1 ½ Stars Out of 5
Torque
Torque is just a long music video that has dialogue that is so bad and action that is so unbelievable that it makes you laugh…but when you realize you paid 8 bucks to see it, it may make you cry…1 ½ Stars Out of 5
Touching Home - Sony - Rated PG-13
Twin brothers Logan & Noah Miller wrote, produced, directed and star in Touching Home. And that's its main problem. They are devoid of any acting talent whatsoever, and they try to carry the movie. But anytime a real actor enters the scene, the twins wither and almost disappear. It's a better movie when they aren't in it. But unfortunately, they are in it 95% of the time. Ed Harris is great as usual, as is Robert Forster, but this is a strange, depressing movie that probably shouldn't have been made. There's nothing touching about it. 2 Stars Out of 5
Toy Story 3 - Disney - Rated G
When was the last time you saw a movie with a "3" in the title that was actually good? Well, Pixar accomplishes the nearly impossible with Toy Story 3. It is every bit as good as the first 2, and maybe even better! I don't know how Pixar keeps doing it! It has amazing detail, plenty of action, a heartwarming story and loads of humor. While most of the favorites from the first two movies are back, Ken, as in Barbie and Ken, voiced by Michael Keaton, steals the movie and is spectacular. His wardrobe alone is worth several times the price of admission. But you will want to bring the tissues, towards the end, there isn't a dry eye in the theater…the three-peat is a 3-D masterpiece. 5 Stars Out of 5
Traitor - Overture Films - Rated PG-13Traitor is executive produced and co-written by Steve Martin, but this is no family comedy. This is a somber and fascinating look into international terrorism. Don Cheadle is as always, amazing, and delivers a multilayered, mesmerizing performance that unexpectedly draws you into a story of terrorism and intrigue. The movie does its best to be provocative and it works. It is complex and convoluted with a number of twists and turns, and we never quite know what is going on until the end. 3 Stars Out of 5
Transamerica
Felicity Huffman is an amazing actress. She makes Transamerica, a film with an assuredly fringe subject extraordinarily watchable, and turns in one of the finest performances of the year. Although I really didn't expect to like it, the film itself is funny, touching, and actually very good. 4 Stars Out of 5
Transformers
Sure Transformers is hokey…but it sure is a blast! Its simple good vs. evil plot combined with action to the extreme and outstanding special effects all make for a great popcorn movie. Star Shia LeBeouf is terrific, and like all of director Michael Bay's films, this has plenty of explosions, is bombastic and too long, but it's probably the most fun you'll have at the movies this summer. 4 Stars Out of 5
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Paramount - Rated PG-13
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen assumes you've seen the first, but then again, if you haven't, don't worry. It doesn't really matter. Even though it is very long, there's not much story here - and what there is, is incomprehensible. There are human stars of the movie, but they don't matter either. Aside from the many crude jokes about male genitalia, there is so much action, the action becomes boring. Director Michael Bay's philosophy of film making is "When you don't know what else to do, blow something up." There is so much bombast it's hard to tell what is going on. There are more explosions than I've ever seen in a movie…Transformers: Stuff Blows Up would be a better name. Or maybe Explosions: The movie. Oh, wait, that's Michael Bay's next film. 2 Stars Out of 5
The Transporter
This is one of the best action films to come out in near memory, and the key word here is action...not acting...If you like lots of great car chases, explosions, and a film that's loads of fun, this one is for you...3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Transporter 2
While the original Transporter was a pretty good action picture with a fresh take on the genre, gimmicks abound in the totally unbelievable Transporter 2. Jason Statham returns as the man who drives and delivers for a living. Even if you check your brain at the door, you will still have a hard time swallowing some of the stunts that abound in this film. It does have a lot of action, with some great chase sequences, but fans of the first film will be disappointed. I was. 3 Stars out of 5
Transporter 3 - Lionsgate - Rated PG-13
Take a cute red haired freckle faced Russian actress in her first film, put her alongside fast car chases, explosions aplenty and Jason Stathan's six pack abs. What do you get? Transporter 3. While it is silly and unbelievable at times, it's an improvement over number two and is good for some mindless fun. 3 Stars Out of 5
Transylmania - Full Circle - Rated R
Hideous in more ways than I could count, Transylmania is a dopey take on vampire films that looks like a high school film project more than a feature film. It makes 90 minutes seem like an eternity. This stupid mishmash is dead on arrival. It's a toothless comedy with no pulse. It made me feel like I was dead. Pound a stake though it's heart, cut off it's head and bury it forever. 1 Star Out of 5
Trapped
This is a hard movie to watch for two reasons. First, its subject matter. It deals with a small girl (played by Dakota Fanning from "I Am Sam") getting stolen from her home and held for ransom. Then, much of it is shot with a hand held camera and the camera movements are so jerky it is difficult to stay focused. This is not a very believable movie and the last quarter is pretty stupid. Charlize Theron is the highlight here, and if Kevin Bacon keeps playing bad guys he'll have to depend on those Visa check card commercials.2 ½ Stars Out of 5
Treasure Planet
Treasure Planet has great visuals...The concept of 18th century sailing ships in the future traveling in space is very interesting...and I did like it, but the movie just seems to be missing a little something. 3 Stars Out of 5
The Tripper
The Tripper and its director David Arquette, do their best to sully the memory of Ronald Reagan by dressing the serial killer in this movie up as the 40th president. It's a grainy, low budget film that is more about drugs than about horror. Just Say No to The Tripper.
1 Star Out of 5
Trisdan & Isolde
James Franco and Sophia Myles form two thirds of a love triangle in Trisdan & Isolde. This takes place in ancient Ireland and England after the fall of the Roman Empire. Franco's acting is sometimes a bit too wooden, but the film's action sequences are pretty good, and the story kept me involved. It's a chick flick that has enough action to satisfy the guys. 3 Stars out of 5
Troy
Inflated to almost 3 hours, Troy could well have been cut to a reasonable length and been decent. What we have, though, is a way overlong frequently tedious, film that thinks it is better than it is. For fans of Homer, there are numerous liberties taken with the story, in fact, too many to mention. The acting covers the gamut from laughably bad (from Brian Cox's over the top performance) to very good from Peter O'Toole. And, the film bestows all of it's beauty scenes not on Helen of Troy, but on Brad of Hollywood…
2 ½ Stars Out of 5
The Truth About Charlie
The Truth About Charlie is this movie tries hard, but isn't mysterious, isn't as action-packed as it promises to be, and isn't much fun. As a matter of fact, the truth about The Truth is, skip it. 2 Stars Out of 5
Tuck Everlasting
This may be a bit of a disappointment for fans of the book, (my son included here) as it takes some artistic license, but this is a great looking, magical, family film that has some touching moments and terrific performances from Ben Kingsley and Alexis Bledel. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Tupac: Ressurection
Tupac: Ressurection is a pretty good documentary that leaves a few unanswered questions. I came away from the movie impressed with Tupac as an artist and persona, but disappointed at the way he wasted his talent and his life. The movie leaves us with the impression that he knew of his impending demise and planned for it. It stops just short of turning him into a martyr and saint.
3 Stars Out of 5
Turistas
Turistas starts off promising with the tale of tourists in Brazil. The first hour has got lots of jiggle and skin, and then the story starts to kick in, teasing us with a tale of black market human organs, but drops the ball and turns into a claustrophobic underwater chase. This had potential, but squanders it. 2 Stars Out of 5
The Tuxedo
The script is a bit ridiculous, but if you check your brain at the door, this movie is fun. Jackie Chan and Jennifer Love Hewitt don't have a whole lot of chemistry here, but Jackie Chan is his usual engaging self, with a bit more special effects than we are used to with a Jackie Chan movie. And once again, the out-takes are the funniest part of the movie.
3 Stars Out of 5
The TV Set
The TV Set is a funny, searing, biting, sarcastic indictment on Television and those that program it. It is very enjoyable with barbed humor that is as relevant today as network was in it's day. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
25th Hour
In the 25th Hour, watch for exceptionally strong performances by Edward Norton and Anna Paquin, slick direction by Spike Lee and great acting all around in this gritty and somewhat depressing story set in post 9-11 New York City. This is not the usual Spike Lee fare.
4 Stars Out of 5
28 Days Later
In 28 Days Later a group of animal rights activists break into a London primate research lab and unwittingly release a virus that turns people into cannibalistic zombies. Flash forward 28 days and a young man awakes from a coma in a hospital to find England deserted with the only signs of life wanting to eat him. Yes, I know this is a cheery subject, but boy is this a good movie! Filmed on video so it has a kind of raw feel from the start. And it will keep you on the edge of your seat. It is terrifying, very well done, and it stays with you for quite awhile after.
4 ½ Stars Out of 5
28 Weeks Later
28 Weeks Later is chock full of great action, scares and good performances but also has an intelligent plot. This is a fine sequel that comes close to the original and adds to it nicely. The ending was left open so I'm wondering if the next will be 28 months later, then the next, 28 Years Later and so on. 4 Stars Out of 5
Twilight - Summit Entertainment - Rated PG-13
Twilight is a chick flick romance wrapped up in a vampire movie.
It's a little campy at times, and throws most vampire conventions out with yesterday's rotten garlic. These vampires have no fangs, don't sleep in coffins or cower at the sight of a cross, and they prefer the rainy Pacific Northwest because when they go in the sunlight it makes their skin glow as if it were embedded with thousands of tiny diamonds. The cast is very good, I was impressed with the two leads, as well as with the supporting cast. The film throws a little conflict in at the last minute almost as an afterthought - it seems rushed and underdone. Twilight has very little sex or violence. No, this is all about the romance. This Vampire has no teeth, but likes to nibble. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Twilight Saga: Eclipse - Summit Entertainment - Rated PG-13
Here's what you want to know about The Twilight Saga: Eclipse. Taylor Lautner's shirt is off for most of the movie. I started counting the scenes where he was bare chested, but then it became obvious that I should instead count the scenes where he is actually wearing a shirt. (One and a half.) Does anything else really matter to Twilight fans? The odd love triangle is in full force, there isn't as much brooding here, which is a plus. The CGI wolves are still hokey - with all the money these films make, couldn't they have spent a little more to make realistic looking wolves? On the plus side, there is more action, more blood and even decapitations.
This is the best of the three films so far…although that's not really saying all that much. The abs have it. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
The Twilight Saga: New Moon - Summit Entertainment - Rated PG-13
In order to make sense out of New Moon, you have to have seen Twilight. Even then, it's not really about the story. It's about the pasty faced vampire Edward with the too-tussled hair, versus the hunky healthy looking werewolf Jacob. It was easy to see who the audience liked as giddy shrieks of delight from the mostly female audience accompanied the removal of Jacob's shirt. I couldn't get past the bad CGI wolves, worse dialogue and wooden acting. This is pure mediocre romantic novel melodrama. There is no blood, but apparently these vampires need calcium because this movie is all cheese. 2 Stars Out of 5
Twisted
While I was watching Twisted it felt like I'd seen this same movie before. Here's Ashley Judd in another movie just like she's made a couple of times before. Ashley is nice to look at, and that's the only reason you'd want to watch this movie. This one isn't very difficult to figure out either…this movie is such a clinker you can hear it clinking from outside the theater.
2 Stars Out of 5
Two Brothers
Two Brothers is too scary for the little kids and too boring for most of the others…If you really love tigers, you should see this movie. It is beautifully shot. But it's too long for a kids movie. The children in the theater were quite restless…paying much more attention to the arms on the seats than to the film. But, I liked it.
3 Stars Out of 5
Two For The Money
I enjoyed both the characters and the performances in Two For The Money especially Al Pacino who almost reprises his role in The Devil's Advocate. Matthew McConaughey and Rene Russo also turn in very good performances. It is extremely entertaining to watch, but it is a close variation on the movie Wall Street. So close, they might have named it Wall Street Lite. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Tyler Perry's Daddy's Little Girls
No Madea this time, but in Tyler Perry's Daddy's Little Girls, Perry delivers a much more polished effort. A little heavier on the religious message than the previous two Tyler Perry films, but overall this morality tale is inspirational and enjoyable.
3 Stars Out of 5
Tyler Perry's I Can Do Bad All By Myself - Lionsgate - Rated PG-13
Tyler Perry's I Can Do Bad All By Myself follows the exact same formula as all of his other movies, but this time has the wonderful Taraji P. Henson in the lead role. That makes all the difference. The film once again combines slapstick with melodrama and a religious message and could do with some trimming, but this is Perry's most appealing movie yet. All of the credit for that goes to Henson. But the laughs go to Perry's Madea. Madea's version of the Bible is the funniest thing in a Tyler Perry movie yet. Nothing bad here. 3 ½ Stars Out of 5
Tyler Perry's The Family That Preys - Lionsgate - Rated PG-13
Tyler Perry is becoming a better director, and The Family That Preys is more even than his earlier efforts, but his storytelling skills are stuck in neutral. This film seems more heavy handed than previous entries and has precious little humor. Still, it has a few bright spots. Kathy Bates is great and is the highlight of the film. Mostly sappy and melodramatic, it ends up being another Thelma and Louise knockoff. 2 ½ Stars Out of 5
Tyson - Sony - Rated R
The biggest problem with the movie Tyson is Mike Tyson himself. He is front and center for most of the film's running time, and, while he commands the boxing ring, he cannot command an audience. His speaking style, combined with unusual editing that overlaps what he says, make this film unintelligible at times, and sometimes downright irritating. He rambles on and on in stunted malaprop littered English with little else but the change of a camera angle to add any variety. Occasionally the film comes up for air, inserting a clip of a fight or past news story, giving us some relief. But the film is not without its merits. What Tyson says about Don King is worth the price of admission all by itself. It's ultimately a film about a boxing legend who reveals himself as someone who was damaged by more than punches. It's not a knockout, but a win by split decision…3 Stars Out of 5
